How Married People Start Sounding Like Rainman (Part 2)

I’m thinking this could become a series. Herewith Sunday night:

Him: There’s a new movie out called Pacific Rim.
Me: Pacific what?
Him: Pacific Rim.
Me: What?
Him: Rim.
Me: What’s a rim? How can the Pacific have a rim?
Him: Listen to me: PACIFIC RIM.
Me: The rim of the Pacific? How can the Pacific have a rim? How can the sea have a rim?
Him: Oh, for fuck’s sake.

I still I have no idea. Anyone wanna shed light?

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How married people start sounding like Rainman

rainman pic

This is a conversation recorded verbatim a few hours after it happened. It’s sad. It’s really, really sad.

Me: Where is the pie?
Him: The pie?
Me: The pie. The pie.
Him: In the fridge.
Me: In the fridge? Why is it in the fridge? You don’t put pies in the fridge.
Him: It’s chicken.
Me: You don’t put pies in the fridge. It was warm. It was still warm. It didn’t need the fridge.
Him: It’s chicken.
Me: Now it’s cold.
Him: So, heat it.
Me: You can’t put pies in the microwave, they go soggy. Why did you put it in the fridge?
Him: Just heat it.
Me: THEY GO SOGGY.
Him: Silence.
Me: Pastry goes soggy. Why don’t you know that?
Him: I always put pies in the microwave.
Me: You also put bread in the microwave. Who does that? Bread.
Him: Silence, during which the pie goes into the microwave.
(2 minutes later)
Me: It’s not that soggy. It’s actually not soggy. Do you want some?
Him: Silence.
Me: Do you want some?
Him: Silence.
Me: Tell me now or it’s going back in the fridge.
Him: There’s nothing wrong with putting bread in the microwave.
Me: Right now, I’m serious.
Him: Yes, I want pie.

THE END.